Zoe Catherine Kendall, artist, writer and human...

Friday, 13 August 2010

a stream of my consciousness on a particular day...

one two three four i am more aware of the need to think or rather to produce work - something palpable, something presentable, a tangible recording, definition of, summary, study of all the things i am experiencing, life, life life life life life life life life life life life - coming at me, me coming at it, my fragment of perspective on slices of all the things that are happening to me, to everyone, what has already happened, what i can learn from the past, what i am learning in the present, what meaning i can extract from all time and space, all relationships between all things, people object and place, sense, experience, a closed fist in the mind, see it opening out, what there is to share, how well i can share it, my part in a shared consciousness, coexisting in a relational field to all other things, shreds of knowledge, scraps from a gigantic disappearing book, disperate understanding, enlightment coming in to focus and out again, seeing details and then a whole, a fragmented mind, torturous episodes of a mental spasm, the brain storms in on itself, input input input ahhhhhhhhhh...... i don't know i don't know i don't know i know i am unsure, uncertain bewildered, between, states of transition, attempts to understand more, to be more, to be, just to be and to relax, something impossible until one is at harmony with oneself, i want to dispose of all of the clutter, no more toxins, flushing myself out, reclaiming wasted spaces, waste occupying my spaces, spaces i want for other things, new ventures, more time to invest in projects of my own, more energy, more interaction, greater study, a richer learning curve.


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